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Oil Containment Solution Randomizer
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This episode is hilarious in a sick sort of way.  Stephen Colbert uses his “randomizer” to throw his hat into the ring of ideas to plug the oil leak.

On a serious note, how much more can the coast line of Louisianna handle?  The SBA has set up a remote office to help small business owners apply for low interest (4%) loans in order to help them survive this crisis.

13 Thoughts to “Stephen Colbert on BP Oil Spill “No One Knows WHAT the F&@ck They Are Doing””

  1. my twin sister lives in Jackson County Mississippi on the Gulf Coast. She has been keeping me updated on the people there and what she tells me is that all are scared and worried. The fishing industry is really taking a huge hit and worried it will be wiped out. Oddly enough many of them have no idea why this happened because like too much of our nation these days, they have no clue of Cheney’s secret energy policy that allowed these corporations to ignore safety regulations.

    I haven’t talked much about this on my show since I haven’t lived in Mississippi for 3 years and frankly am too angry about it to do so without getting beyond the point of acceptable language. The same people who brought us this mindset of greed is good brought us this situation and generations will suffer even more thanks to it. This is why the hate and greed crowd has to be exposed for the cancer they are.

    1. Sarge, please keep us apprised of the situation in Mississippi. I selfishly have been sitting here thinking I might never eat shrimp again, or at least American shrimp.

      You sure have gone from hot and sultry to dry and hot.

  2. punchak

    Avarice is an ugly word!

  3. Cheney? You mean the man that left office over a year ago, the VICE President that has no authority? If Cheney’s policies were so terrible, why wasn’t there a Congressional review when the Dems took over. Obama was a huge recipient of BP donations. Waivers were given to that rig LAST year.

    http://dyn.politico.com/printstory.cfm?uuid=6584A5A0-18FE-70B2-A838E6437FBEC75D

    If Cheney’s policy was so secret, how did corporations get away with ignoring safety policies? The enforcers of that policy would either reveal Cheney’s policy or cite the corporations. Besides, if its secret, how do you know that his policy did such things? Must not have been so secret. Don’t you think its about time that Bush and Cheney stopped getting blamed for things that are the responsibility of the current crop in DC. Including the Congress that took over in 2006.

    Who is this hate and greed crowd? The only greedy people that I’ve seen haven’t been too hateful, unless you count the politicians decrying the angry citizens. Both the big business people and the politicians that they are in bed with are the greediest of the bunch. That’s how big government works. The businesses with the money make the deals.

    Before people start talking about blame for this thing, why not find out what actually happened. There hasn’t been a clear statement of cause, much less an official one.

    Why is it that the press isn’t out there? Where’s the helicopter footage of the slick? Do you think that this lack of press would have happened if Bush was still in office?

  4. @cargosquid

    I guess you haven’t been aware of the story, it was in the press http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2005/11/15/AR2005111501842.html
    As for footage on the oil gusher, there is ample video available on it, and if you google you can find several videos of it. As for the story in Mississippi I have friends and family there who keep me updated and sometimes I mention what they say on my show, but I am focused right now more on SB1070 since I have lived in Arizona for 3 years and am more affected directly by it. Hope that answers your question, but if you want you are more than welcomed to call my show and I will be glad to discuss it with you even if it isn’t the topic of the show.

  5. @Herb Sarge Phelps
    I understand that they met and made recommendations. That is old news and was discussed exhaustively on the news. Why the corporations said what they did, I don’t know and think its dumb.

    But, again, if the actual policy was so secret, how can any public actions take place? Why were there no inquiries when Pelosi took over? Of course, if you want to develop an energy policy, one talks to the energy companies. The input from the ecology side has never stopped. The lawsuits and protests have shut down the refinery and nuclear industry expansion.

    While there may be ample footage of the gusher, the 24 hours news cycle is keeping it low key. As they did the Nashville disaster. I’m comparing the coverage to any problems under
    Bush. Criticism has been very low key.

  6. Elena

    Cargo,
    I believe that FOIA request, for what happend in that meeting between big energy and Cheney, went all the way to the Supreme Court and it was denied. No one will ever know. However, I will say, I am concerned at the level of donations that BP gave to Obama. Having said that, BP got their butts dragged into congress today and I am hopeful we will find some real answers.

    “Brownie” having the nerve to suggest that Obama was pleased with this disaster is disgraceful. Obama NEVER said he was against drilling as a means to graner more oil WHILE the country works towards more “green” energy solutions. In fact, Obama pissed off the environmental community when he pushed for more off shore drilling.

  7. Actually, I don’t have a position about Obama’s reaction to the leak. There is nothing a President can do except depend upon his subordinates. Unfortunately, Homeland Security, etc, seem to have stumbled coming out of the gate. Same thing about Nashville. My complaint is with the media and its double standards.

    I don’t think anyone will ever know what went on in the meetings. But, since POLICY was mentioned, THAT is fair game. If there are directives and policies developed, then, if there is a problem, Congress can investigate that. My objection was the knee jerk reaction in blaming Cheney for policies that have not been changed under new management. Especially since Cheney has no authority. Now, if you want to blame Bush, go ahead. He was the boss. But you must also assign blame to any Congress in power since then and to any regulatory entities under their or the admin’s authority.

    All we know now is that there WAS a blow out. We don’t know why. We do know that, if there was a back up plan, if failed. For all we know, there was nothing we could do, no matter what. Heck, some think, because of the reaction of sending SWAT, that it could have been sabotage.

    Until we know, I’m withholding judgment except in the matter of the reaction to the mess.

  8. Elena

    garner……not graner!

    Cargo,
    Cheney, in many peoples opinion, was much more than your typical VP! I respect your decision to withhold judgement for now, that sounds fair.

  9. hello

    The Obama administration had a plan for a oil spill in the gulf, it’s actually been in place since 1994. The plan called for the use of fire booms to burn off oil. However, when it takes Obama (BP’s #1 recipient of campaign cash) 8 days to actually do anything about the spill guess what happened… not a single fire boom was on hand in the entire gulf region.

    Also interesting thing about BP’s #1 guy they gave cash to, HIS Interior Department exempted BP’s Gulf of Mexico drilling operation from a detailed environmental impact analysis just last year! Imagine that…. BP’s gives Obama more cash than any other politician, he in turn gives them safety exemptions on environmental impact analysis of a GULF OF MEXICO OIL SPILL! http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/05/04/AR2010050404118.html

    Money talks I suppose, campaign donors bought themselves cushy ambassadorships. I guess BP bought themselves exemptions on having to do pesky environmental impact analysis. Isn’t it great! All while in the most “transparent and ethical administration” EVER!

    Just a few days after this spill happened I read somewhere that this was Obama’s ‘Katrina’. I thought it was a bit early for that kind of talk but it’s shaping up more and more like that every day.

    To semi-quote Kanye West… “Obama hates gulf people, and wild life”

  10. These guys seem to know what to do.

    http://gatewaypundit.firstthings.com/2010/05/southern-hicks-hired-to-clean-up-gulf-spill-with-hay-video/

    Redneck tech for the win!

    Heck, even if it doesn’t work…..at least SOMEONE is thinking…..

  11. hello

    Great video cargo, however, these guys have a few things going against them… for one, this is way too simple for the elites in DC to even consider it, and they are white guys with southern accents so they must be racist, homophobic, immigrant hating teaparty members. The overalls don’t help either.

    Other than that it’s a great idea, apparently they guy in overalls is an erosion expert, did I hear that right?

  12. I think it is time that the public lets BP know that we expect more than they are delivering. Sir Winston Churchill said, “It is not enough to say that we are doing our best, we must succeed at doing what is necessary.

    What is necessary is to stop the oil flow.

    I propose that all Americans immediately boycott BP gas stations in America until the oil flow has stopped and that all BP credit card holders cut their cards and send them in to BP in protest. If they stopped selling gas even for a day or two, they might realize it is “necessary” to get some results.

    Randy Coleman

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