There are many reasons why I am not a nun.  The main reason is that forgiveness is not my strong suit. 

In the tragic wake of Sunday’s accident on Bristow Road, where 1 sister was killed and 2 more lie in a hospital bed, barely clinging to life, the sisters of the Benedictine Order magnanimously have requested that their tragedy be viewed in terms of alcoholism and drunk driving rather than used as a platform to rail against illegal immigration. 

Politicians and news stations have flagrantly disregarded the sisters’ request.  Sister Denise and the driver of the other car, Carlos Martinelly, have been plastered all over every TV screen and newspaper since the accident occurred early Sunday morning, as the 3 sisters were driving to Mass. 

The Washington Post has attempted to honor the Order’s request in their front page story today.  They have attached faces to this tragedy.  It is impossible to discuss this accident without the illegal immigrant issue creeping in.

Nuns at Virginia monastery find room to forgive while mourning sister’s death

About 8:30 Monday night, the doorbell rang at St. Benedict Monastery in Prince William County, and Sister Andrea Verchuck, the sub-prioress, rose from her desk to see who was there. On the slate front porch stood a man and a woman

They looked contrite,” said Verchuck, 81, who has lived with other nuns in the wooded monastery for 66 years. The visitors’ hands were at their sides, their eyes cast down, as Verchuck greeted them.

“They said, ‘We’d like to talk with someone about the sister who was killed,’ ” she recalled.

The day before, Sister Denise Mosier, 66, riding in a car with two other nuns in Prince William, had died in a collision with an alleged drunk driver. The other nuns, 70 and 75, were critically injured. The man and woman at the monastery door were the parents of the driver charged with manslaughter in the crash. They had come to seek forgiveness for him.

The suspect, Carlos A. Martinelly-Montano, 23, is a Bolivian national whose family says he entered the United States illegally in 1996 but was currently working legally. His status has become a flash point in the heated debate over immigration policy. The U.S. Department of Homeland Security began deportation proceedings against Martinelly-Montano in 2008, after an earlier drunken driving arrest. But immigration officials, citing privacy laws, have declined to explain why his case still remains unresolved.

They looked contrite,” said Verchuck, 81, who has lived with other nuns in the wooded monastery for 66 years. The visitors’ hands were at their sides, their eyes cast down, as Verchuck greeted them.

“They said, ‘We’d like to talk with someone about the sister who was killed,’ ” she recalled.

The day before, Sister Denise Mosier, 66, riding in a car with two other nuns in Prince William, had died in a collision with an alleged drunk driver. The other nuns, 70 and 75, were critically injured. The man and woman at the monastery door were the parents of the driver charged with manslaughter in the crash. They had come to seek forgiveness for him.

Amid the tangle of legal issues and cauldron of emotions surrounding Martinelly-Montano’s recent case, a moment of simple purity unfolded Monday night, Verchuck said. Alejandro and Maria Martinelly stood sobbing, telling Verchuck how sorry they were, saying that their son, a father of two young children, is a heavy drinker and that they had tried to set him straight.

“I said, ‘Please get help for him so he can stop, or he won’t be a good parent,’ ” Verchuck recalled. And true to the spirit of her religious order, the Benedictine Sisters of Virginia, she said what they had hoped to hear:

“We wanted to let them know we hold no grudges.”

‘He’s a good man’

Martinelly-Montano, who has a record of numerous motor vehicle offenses in recent years, including drunken driving convictions in 2007 and 2008, was not seriously injured in the crash near Bristow. Besides manslaughter, punishable by up to 10 years in prison, he has been charged with drunken driving and driving after a license revocation. He is in custody at a hospital and has been ordered held without bond, said Prince William Commonwealth’s Attorney Paul B. Ebert.

When Maria Martinelly learned by phone Sunday morning that her family’s Subaru Outback had collided with a car carrying three nuns, killing one of them, she thought of Carlos Martinelly-Montano, the oldest of her three sons, she  said in an interview.

“Oh my God — how did he find the car keys?” she said.

The parents, who live in Prince William, said they had been hiding the keys because of his drunken driving convictions. They said that after an early morning drinking binge, Martinelly-Montano found the keys in a closet and left.

 

Maria Martinelly recalled the conversation with Verchuck and a novice nun when she and her husband visited the monastery. “He had a bad drinking problem, but he’s a good man,” she told them.

The family entered the United States illegally in 1996, when their oldest son was 8, they said, and spent more than a decade as undocumented immigrants. In 2007, the parents, their daughter and their oldest son got work permits from the Department of Homeland Security, they said, even though they had been in the country illegally. Anthony Guerrieri, a spokesman for the temporary employment agency that hired Martinelly-Montano in April, said in an e-mail that the suspect “successfully cleared the . . . employment verification process and upon hire, was eligible for employment in the U.S.”

Federal and local authorities, however, said they consider Martinelly-Montano to be an illegal immigrant.

It seems that Martinelly’s status really hasn’t been totally determined.  The rest of his family is documented.  Could it be that he was being deported because he was an habitual offender?  Anyone who is not a citizen can be deported.  That includes legal residents.  More importantly, Let’s put a face on this tragedy.  We have an 8 year old boy brought to America about 15 years ago.  This boy, for whatever reason, has the same demons that many Americans have–alcoholism. 

We pay a great deal of lip-service to alcoholism.  Churches and businesses smugly host meeting rooms, often on a nightly basis, to AA groups.  However, when it comes right down to it, we, as a society, are very judgemental about alcoholism and drinking in general.  Drinking is fine if we never ever become intoxicated.  The problem is, alcohol impairs judgement and judgement is what is needed to cut off intake.  Those with a problem, a psychological or physiological dependence on alcohol, are doomed from the start.  The nuns get it.  The rest of us don’t. 

Perhaps all of us in Prince William County need to take a closer look at how we contributed, at least in spirit, to this tragedy.  I seem to recall that one of the components of the July 10, 2007 Immigration Resolution was that illegal immigrants would be ineligible to  receive services for substance abuse.   Now who does that punish?  Alcoholism crosses all strata of society–all nationalities and races.  Not allowing illegal immigrants access to alcohol rehabilitation seems like penny wise and pound foolish…especially when one weigh the potential consequences of untreated alcoholism. 

I believe we need to honor the Benedictine Sisters’ wishes and re-commit to helping those with substance abuse problems.  We need to mourn the loss of a sister from our community and pray for the speedy recovery of  Sister Connie and Sister Charlotte.  It is high time to stop politicizing this horrible accident.  We should be able to discuss illegal immigration without disregarding the wishes of the Benedictine Nuns.

79 Thoughts to “Nuns Find Room to Forgive–Politicians Ignore Their Request”

  1. TWINAD

    Slow,

    Seriously, illegals should be put to death for building houses? Now I know to never take anything at all you say seriously.

    All,

    Most posters know my deal. This type of incident makes me all the more frustrated that an illegal immigrant married to a citizen for 10 years has no way to adjust their status. Suppose my husband gets in a car accident and someone is killed? Is he and our family going to be raked over the coals because of an accident that could happen to anyone? He has a driver’s license and I must say, is a better driver than I am seeing as I am unable to maneuver our jet ski into the water off the trailer. I’m not saying driving drunk, I’m saying an accident that could happen that might not even be his fault. But now, since “he never should have been here to begin with”, he is going to be seen as a killer?

    I see that there are rumblings about proposals that some of the illegal population could be legalized without CIR. I hope people like my husband will be in that class.

  2. Elena

    Need to Know :@Second-Alamo
    When will Corey crack down on illegal employers so there would be no jobs to attract people like Montano to our community in the first place?

    NTK,
    He was 8 and a child when he moved here with him family. He wasn’t “looking” for a job 😉

  3. Elena

    Rez :Elena, even if you have good intervention, how do you get people to go? Unfortunately, from my perspective, many attend because of some penalty action pending against them, not because they necessarily want help. In a lot of cases, substance abuse feels better than the situation they are in. So as much as one could hope and pray, feeling good usually trumps hopelessness, even if the feeling good is a sham.
    As the old saying goes, you don’t start healing until you admit to a problem. That means that it comes very late in the process after much damage has been done.

    You are right. You can bring a horse to water……. as the old saying goes. Look at all the famous hollywood types who struggle with addiction and never overcome their illness. I believe that some people are simply predisposed to addiction. I don’t use this as an excuse for people, but simply as a frame of reference. My first boyfriend, very sweet soul, was an alcholic. He had a college degree, he was smart, but he got two DWI’s and actuallly had to take anabuse per court requirements. Eventually he got into harder stuff and I decided it was not my lifes mission to save him. I know his mother was an alcholic too so maybe there was no hope for him from the very get go. Nature vs Nature, I am sure there is a co-existing factor for addiction.

  4. Yes Rez, I meant you, not TP. I got distracted.

    Sure, communion wine will not make you drunk. We are talking a sip rather than glugs…many glugs. But the point is, people get on their high horse about drunkeness. Alcohol impairs one’s judgement and then we hold the person responsible. Our attitudes, laws and social mores are very screwed up.

    I wasn’t necessarily suggesting that the government provide pub rescue serves. Citizen volunteers do it in most communities.

  5. @Rez
    And many people are genetically predisposed towards alcoholism. Many people with Indian blood go nuts when they drink. Something about their inner ears….there are all sorts of reasons. And you can lead horses to water but not make them drink.

    Physical addiction is only one part of it.

  6. Rez

    Not disagreeing in the least about the conversation. I don’t doubt the concept of addictive personalities or genetic predisposition in the least. There are many reasons for abuse and not all solutions will fit everyone.

    The conservative in me would like to see an evaluation of existing programs when new ones are proposed. If the other program is not working, drop it and put the money in the new program. I would rather 100% go into things that may work than to divide it 50/50 with programs that historically have not worked. I would rather help people frankly with the money I give in taxes than continue to toss money at things that don’t work.

    We spend $30-50 billion a year in this country on substance abuse programs but unless it is all media, it doesn’t seem like things are getting better with the help.

  7. Emma

    I am glad the Sisters find it in their heart to forgive. That is what nuns do. But their religious beliefs should have no bearing on the words or actions of our policymakers in getting at the root cause of these types of incidents and figuring out how to prevent them from recurring. If we’re going that way, than no one should have a problem with the Church interjecting itself into the abortion debate, or trying to influence people not to use birth control, or any other social issue, for that matter. I just think it’s indisputable that if this illegal immigrant had been deported the first time, this would not have happened.

    I drive in that area several times a week. Those nuns could easily have been me and my two teenagers. Had I lost my own child, I would be demanding answers to questions our federal government simply does not want to hear right now. I think there are some who need to separate their antipathy for Corey from the need to ask the very legitimate question about why our federal government puts the rights of illegal aliens over and above the rights of American citizens.

  8. Elena

    How would you avoid getting hit and killed by a drunk driver no matter what their background? The grandmother and grandchild that were killed by a drunk driver, how do we go back and ensure less are killed. This young man may very well have been here with a legal status…………now what?

  9. marinm

    Even with legal status (assuming he’s not a citizen) he could be expelled from this country after paying his pound of flesh to our state judicial system.

  10. The difference, Emma, is that you would be trying to make sense out of your tragic loss. Corey is making political hay while the sun shines. He doesn’t even have all his facts right. He thinks ICE deports…in everything conversation I have heard come out of his mouth.

    The sisters have asked that THIS tragedy not be used by people to advance their political agenda regarding immigration. That seems reasonable. After all, their beloved sister was killed because the guy was drunk driving, not because of his questionable status.

    Rez, I totally agree with you about programs. There are some practices out there that don’t do swat…those should be abandoned. One such practice comes to mind: Court ordered AA meetings. I don’t know what should be done about drunk driving but we don’t do enough. Having an alternative would be a place to start, especially in areas where there is no public transportation to speak of. I also like my free access to breathalizer. Then I could be in charge of my own behavior. Right now it is a crap shoot.

  11. Marin is right. The only people who are not subject to deportation are native born US citizens. Even naturalized citizens can be deported if they are bad enough.

  12. Second-Alamo

    “This young man”, sorry he lost his status as a MAN a long time ago!

  13. Lucky Duck

    MH, an illegal immigrant awaiting a deportation hearing can be issued legal documents by ICE allowing him/her to work legally until the deportation hearing. It happens on a regular basis out in the midwest when the produce plants are raided.

    This individual is not a legal resident of the US, he has no paperwork permitting him to be in the country legally according to the PWC Commonwealth’s Attorney’s office.

  14. Lucky Duck

    Also, I am against taxpayer support for allowing non-citizens to use such public substance abuse programs as you mentioned much earlier. There are enough legal residents and citizens that can use the help and there are only so many tax dollars and rehab slots to go around. Take care of our own first. Just my two cents.

  15. Thanks for the clarification, Lucky Duck. During this entire process I have learned new stuff. I didn’t realize that work papers were seperate and distinct from papers that allow you to be in this country.

    Lucky Duck, what percent actually show up to a deportation hearing?

  16. SA, are you mentally castrating Martinelly because he was brought here illegally as a child or because he was a drunk driver? re not a man

  17. Slowpoke Rodriguez

    I think it’s quite nice that the Benedictine sisters (the ones still alive, that is) forgive this guy. Well, I guess that’s it, then! Case closed, the guy’s forgiven, set him loose!

  18. Slowpoke Rodriguez

    How does the dead sister feel about this poor dude with the minor character flaw? Oh, nuts, we can’t ask her. Well, I bet she’d forgive him too.

  19. marinm

    Lucky, I agree with you. There is something to be said about the cold rehabilitation behind bars in a Virginia prison and then transfer to a federal penal facility before transport to your home country.

  20. @Slow, I believe on their website they said the legal system would handle him. Seems fair enough. Why do you begrudge nuns doing what nuns do? They are sort of in the forgiveness business. No one as mentioned setting him free.

    There is just no reason for him to be the Willie Horton of illegal immigration. He is a bad choice. He was brought here as a child. And I know this for a fact because I knew him when he was much younger.

    Sister Denise was killed because a drunk driver hit her. The other sisters are in critical condition because a drunk driver hit them. The status of Marinelly has nothing to do with their accident. Drunk driving does.

    I am sick of Boy-Babbler Stewart speaking into every mic Willie Hortoning this situation so he can get elected to some higher office. It won’t work. He will shoot himself in the foot because of hubris, arrogance, greed and overwhelming, blind ambition.

  21. Lucky Duck, I am in favor of anyone with a substance abuse problem who wants to clean up getting the help that they need. Substance abusers endanger a community. I don’t see it as a privilege. I see it as helping the community. [she said selfishly]

    To deny out of status people alcohol treatment is just shooting ourselves in the foot. How many crimes are committed because of substance abuse? Robberies, burglaries, A & B’s, rapes, auto accidents? That’s what I want to avoid. Its also a form of medical treatment. Americans don’t withhold medical treatment.

    Of course a person has to want help first. Otherwise it does no good.

  22. Lucky Duck

    MH, I don’t know how many actually show up for a deportation hearing. I am not sure that ICE would even share that statistic.

    Siding with Marinm, if someone is in prison for their actions long enough, they will be unable to get the substance that they are abusing.

  23. Most people don’t seek help. Most of the time it is court ordered. There is that bottoming out that needs to happen.

  24. Addiction is a progressive disease. Bottom is relative — it’s when you decide your life is unmanageable. Don’t enable the addict, and bottom comes sooner rather than later.

    This has been a terrible week for loss of life and suffering. To me it’s only compounded by politicians using the situation. I didn’t like the Grizzlies being used as human shields to deflect attention from a “tough decision” to renige on a pledge. I don’t like the Benedictine Sisters being used, either, to further someone’s political ambitions.

  25. Lucky Duck

    I agree, most people do not seek help. But unfortunately, even the court system rehab programs have a limited number of slots. When they are full, the prisoner either waits for a slot to open or the government goes outside to a private vendor (at a much higher cost) for an additional slot. I am not in favor of paying that cost.
    I go back to saying that I feel that any available slots should first go to those in the country legally. If someone is doing prison time and there are no slots available, they’ll dry out the hard way, but they will dry out.

  26. Once someone has screwed up, I will agree with you, Lucky Duck. However, if someone wants to clean up and dry out before they run afoul of the law and draw prison time, I want them to be allowed into treatment programs, regardless of status.

    I want addiction treated like any other medical problem at that point. Post conviction, then I agree.

    Cindy, Not sure I agree about the bottoming out. People I have known have been too far gone to make the decision that their life is unmanageable. But bottoming out appears to be different for different folks. A spouse leaves, a car is wrecked, the cat gets put in the microwave, job loss, the list goes on.

  27. Elena

    Lucky Duck,
    Thank you for sharing the information regarding the work visa even without proper status. I find that very interesting, I had not idea.

    As far as substance abuse, I had a an ex who was required to take anabuse (sure I am not spelling it correctly), but wouldn’t that be the FIRST line of defense with repeat DUI offenders in addition to some jail time? If you can’t drink, you can’t drive drunk? Seems like a simpler solution and alot less expensive than jail. For me, I am big into prevention. Many people sitting in jail have mental health problems and substance abuse problems. I would imagine it is alot cheaper to invest in real rehab than jails for people that get into deep crime because of drinking and drugging. What is the old saying…”an ounce of prevention…………”

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