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According to Washingtonpost.com, psychology has confirmed what women have known all along:

Depressing news from the world of psychology: nearly every stereotype about the gender gap with regards to narcissism, ambition and leadership is right.

That’s according to a study in the March issue of the Psychological Bulletin, the journal of the American Psychological Association. In a review of three decades of survey data from nearly half a million participants, researchers found that men are more likely to demonstrate narcissistic behavior than women, regardless of generation or age.

With what must have been a tremendous tolerance for inflated egos, the researchers examined some of humanity’s least-attractive characteristics — manipulativeness, self-absorption, aggression and arrogance among them — and looked at how people responded to statements that included “If I ruled the world, it would be a much better place” and “I know that I am good because everyone keeps telling me so.” Lucky them.

They then qualified “narcissism” according to three facets: entitlement, leadership/authority and grandiose/exhibitionism. Men scored measurably higher than women in the first two categories, and were more likely to agree with phrases like “I like having authority over people” and “I insist upon getting the respect that is due to me.” They were also more likely to exploit others and to believe that they were entitled to special privileges. But there was hardly any deviation between the two genders in the grandiose/exhibitionism category, which includes qualities like vanity and self-absorption.

Ask any woman.  We all knew these facts without research.  Society teaches baby girls  to suppress these egotistical urges.  The me me me behavior demonstrated by most infants gets smacked down in our culture if demonstrated by girls, all while we laugh at and encourage    baby boy tendencies to dominate and demand.    “That’s our boy!”  “Why he’s all boy!”   By the time a kid hits first grade these attributes have been refined and engrained in our cultural gender personalities as well as individual personalities.

Is there an answer?  Probably not.  Mothers and wives can probably have the most influence if change is to be made.  We can stop thinking this behavior is cute and we can stop reinforcing it.  We can force husbands to get over themselves and to assume responsibility for themselves.  I have long held the belief that men wouldn’t even own underwear if they didn’t have wives or mothers.

The older my husband gets the more I see this sense of entitlement.  At what point does a person just break down and make his own sandwich and … this IS important, clean up after himself.  How difficult is it to wipe down a countertop?  I won’t go on…lest a lifetime of petty grievances surface.  I grew up with brothers so perhaps I am a bit jaded.

Thanks, psychologists, for telling us what we already knew.  I suppose it helps to reinforce this knowledge with a “study.”

23 Thoughts to “Mirror Mirror: Who’s the most narcissistic of us all?”

  1. BSinVA

    In the interest of self-preservation — I’m not going to touch this thread !

    1. No seems to be going near it. Ha! Most of our contributors are men.

  2. BSinVA

    I’ll let Cargo or Wolve come blasting in here and shovel out some ego stuff.

  3. Ed Myers

    Men develop following the norms that women establish during child rearing and now it is men’s problem that they exhibit most of “humanity’s least-attractive characteristics.” Misandry much?

    The Women-Good-Men-Bad stereotypical sexist premise at the root of this research shows that men have a long way to go in this society before they are respected as equals by women.

    1. You sure read more into that article than I did. In today’s society, men and women share a much more equal role in child upbringing. Will it have an impact?

      I am not sure equality has anything to do with it. I think generally speaking, men are more self centered and convinced of their own sense of entitlement. Do you disagree?

  4. Cargosquid

    @BSinVA
    We save that for the other threads.

  5. Cargosquid

    I am…how my mother raised me.

    Thus….. my ego is healthy. I’m right…..just ask me…..
    Thus….. I’m raising my daughter with a healthy ego. She knows that the Dad is always right. Even if she won’t admit it. And that rule is in force at all times unless conflicts with Rule #1. Because we all know that the MOM is the the that is ALWAYS right.

  6. blue

    Follow the money and you could have determined the result before the fist page was
    written.

  7. Wolve

    I have never taken a selfie in my life. I will never take a selfie, even if I had one of those silly selfie sticks. Now, leave me alone. I’m reading that new Brit study on penis size. And the story about a Nigerian bride who filed for a divorce only a week after her wedding. Turns out her husband was just toooooo big for her to handle.

  8. Wolve

    Cargo — Did you have underwear before you got married?

    1. Does the military make you have underwear?

  9. BSinVA

    No underwear in the military – just skivvies.

  10. Wolve

    I would have said skivvies, BS; but most readers these days might think that was some kind of thing used to go snow sledding or a new tech device from Apple or a brand of condom or something.

    1. I thought everyone knew what skivvies were.

  11. Cargosquid

    @Wolve
    Yes….yes I did……

    Why do you ask?

  12. Wolve

    @Cargosquid

    The Blogmeister says she believes that men wouldn’t have underwear if it wasn’t for the influence of mothers and wives. Did you have any significant time interval between Mommy and wifey and did you wear underwear during that time? Gallup may want to know.

    Come to think of it, there were times in Africa……damned heat, lousy rashes, hurt like hell…..

  13. Ed Myers

    Well if you went from mother to military service to wife then you’ve never been on your own. Perhaps that explains the perspective: an inability to manage life without someone forcing order and discipline.

  14. Ed Myers

    @Moon, I think the fact that men are more involved in child rearing (I stayed home for 18 months with my son while my wife worked) will narrow the gap between men and women. I also managed to live alone for 15 years so I don’t accept the premise that all men can’t survive without women. I think more of the differences between men and women are culturally taught and not the result of testosterone poisoning.

    1. I think plenty of men can survive without women. I just think a lot of them wouldn’t wear underwear.

      I don’t think women are superior to men either. I think both genders have their good points. (and bad points)

  15. Wolve

    Can we mark down Ed then as sans undies for 15 years?

  16. Ed Myers

    Sorry, I’m not getting the underwear joke. Is this the female equivalent of the jokes men tell about women and their abuse of cars?

    It is fun to make light of the differences between men and women provided at the end we agree that a family is stronger and more efficient because of those differences and our lives are sexier too.

  17. Wolve

    It’s an inside joke, Ed. I think it may have started out with a sandwich and a messy kitchen counter, but I can’t swear to that.

  18. Cargosquid

    @Wolve
    Aaaah…

    Well….. I did have a time of living on my own for about a year….
    I did pretty well. I remember to put on underwear. Even put it on the INSIDE of my clothes and everything.

    I can’t swear that it was MY underwear…… I mean…I AM from New Orleans…..

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