Go woman in yellow, go! She did what a parent should do when they catch their kid being a thug. That was tough love. When interviewed, she said he was her only son and she didn’t want him to become a Freddie. Sometimes that’s what it takes.
Now, when will so bleeding heart do-gooder start whining because she beat her kid about the head and shoulders? Don’t worry. It is coming. It’s about time people stand up and applaud parents for a good whack here and a good whack there rather than parent-shaming that goes on nowadays.
That kid had it coming. I think that woman was a good mother. She did what needed to be done. Get your ass off the street. She might have saved his life.
This is a discussion America needs to have. What she did was not child abuse in my world.
Confession: yes I have done that to both of mine–not regularly but in extreme times.
Mothers, don’t let your sons grow up to be thugs. The mother in yellow was a hero.
GOOD FOR HER – that is what is missing in today’s world. She saw her son doing wrong, admitted it to herself and reacted. I applaud her. More parents should do the same instead of sticking there heads in the sand and saying – ‘Not my child’.
Beating a child is a symptom of a lack in self control. Allowing one’s emotions to dictate one’s actions results in all sorts of problems later in life. Whether this mother is passing her lack of self control on to her son through nurture or nature, the child is not going to learn to successfully take control of their own life by being taught that beating up on someone is how you communicate or that people that are bigger and more powerful should use violence to coerce others to do their bidding.
Rioting is this mother’s actions writ large.
@Ed Myers
Ed, are you deliberately contrarian? This mother took responsibility for and exercised natural authority over her minor child, ending his participation in unlawful conduct. We need more of this in society.
Totally agree, Steve.
Much like every post you make, Ghandi.
You call that a beating??
It just amazes me that people will say how bad rioting is and that the rioters should be shot and killed and then encourage police and parents to exhibit rioting behavior as long as it is on poor children in an inner city so it doesn’t affect us. Sheesh.
Violence as is wrong whether it is by children or police or even mothers.
Maybe she should have set him down and had a talk with him. NOT!
Do you call that violent?
Maybe she should have tasered him instead.
@Pat, “You call that a beating??”
Moon called it a beating: “Mother in Yellow beats son.”
Maybe she will defend the description. You can offer your own viewpoint that it was no big thing …not a violent assault…but only if you first do it to a police officer and escape a felony charge.
What would you call what she did? She beat him with her hands and fists. The kid deserved it.
@Pat, … and still alive.
Ed is clearly a troll.
He is entitled to his opinion. He isn’t abusing us. However, I think he is definitely by himself on this one.
That woman lit into that kid as she should have. Maybe she saved his life. You never know.
I believe parents have an obligation to make their kids behave. Too many want to make up excuses for their kids and blame someone else or challenge the rules.
@Rick, what I dislike about this story is it feeds so many stereotypes and prejudices mostly of blame the victim style. The subtext is that the people in Baltimore do not have a valid complaint about police brutality because everyone in that ghetto are out-of-control undisciplined products of welfare queen mothers who don’t discipline their children….except for this rare exception that is so extraordinary we must all laud it as an if-only-everyone-did-this.
You are getting it, Steve.
I guess the preferred response from the mom should have been, “Honey, when you’re done looting, burning, and throwing stuff at police, come right home. And don’t forget to take the trash out.”
I think she was a bit afraid for her son. As parents we all know our fear quickly turns to anger – once we know they’re in one piece. He sure didn’t hit her back so I don’t think she’s created an atmosphere of violence at home.
@Emma – what? No “please” in your response?
@Lyssa Forgot my manners!
How many times have we told our kids “If you ever….I’ll kill you!” And it was almost always something that we feared would hurt or kill them. Mine weren’t exactly immune to the irony, either.
I think somewhere in there is “I brought you in to this world, I will take you out…”
I have said If you ever….I will kill you many times. Fear does generate those words.
The mother and son were both interviewed by Anderson Cooper tonight.
She was afraid he was over there … went looking for him, and found him there with a brick in his hand.
The kid himself seemed pretty dumb and inarticulate. I’m not saying that casually – he was DUMB and he’s inarticulate. He loves and respects his mom, but I doubt there’s a happy ending down the road for him.
@Emma: “How many times have we told our kids “If you ever….I’ll kill you!””
Are you serious, or is this a joke?
I can’t imagine a parent saying this to a child. I know this is the sort of stuff written into sit-coms because the irony makes it funny. But, I never thought a parent would actually say this in real life. My parents never said anything like that. I’ve never heard friends or relatives say that. I certainly haven’t said it. All I can say is Wow. Unbelievable! Really?
Maybe that is the reason you grew up to have such an unrealistic view of the real world.
Ed, most people I know have had their parents say, something to that effect. “If you fall overboard, I will kill you!” You must have been raised by very rigid, humorless people.
It’s an idiomatic expression.
If you have never hit your child out of anger you are either a saint or a liar.
I agree, 6-pk.
@Six Pack. Are you serious that smacking your kids or spouse around because you are angry is part of most people’s normal existence? Does this require regular drinking?
I seriously thought physical abuse was just the experience of the unfortunate few. Posters here seem to think it normal. What this mother did is way over the line in my book. She should have grabbed him by the arm, marched him home, taken the cell phone away and instituted house arrest until the riots are over. Smacking him up in public was physically wrong and also wrong because it was public shaming.
I’m no saint but apparently my children are because I’ve never needed to hit them or threaten to kill them. They learned to avoid danger with just a stern look or a gentle reminder. Parenting does not need to be abusive.
That’s not what 6 pack said. Haven’t you ever smacked a child’s hand when he stick it on the stove? Have you ever popped a child’s bottom to get his attention?
I am guessing if you say no then you probably haven’t spent a great deal of time raising children. Trust me, it isn’t abuse.
Grabbed him by the arm? You must not have seen the same video I did.
I am happy that your children were near perfect. Mine were not. I expect I probably spent a lot more times raising kids than you did. I have popped each and every one of mine and without apology.
Please tell me you aren’t one of those people who tries to reason with a 2 year old.
One more thing. I do not like the implication you have made that 6 pack is an abusive parent or spouse. Nothing he has said has indicated that is the case and I am issuing you a warning over making that suggestion.
I’ve never spanked my daughter. It’s not that I disapprove of spanking. It’s just that she’s never done anything to warrant a spanking
I am no saint, either. Just blessed to have a child who understands respect works both ways, and has a pleasant disposition.
She certainly is a good child.
Maybe your daughter is the saint.
@Ed Myers Dead serious, Ed.
And good on you for your sainted life!
I didn’t intend to make the suggestion that Six Pack was abusive. I should have written “smacking ONE’s kids or spouse around.” But then (s)he did smugly accuse me of being a liar so my apology is pretty weak and I did intentionally make a joke about drinking because of the handle. Otherwise I would have assumed Six Pack was reference to a man’s abs and not his nightly consumption. Warning noted.
I assumed it was an ab remark also. I also think 6 pk is a man but I could be wrong.
@Moon “Haven’t you ever smacked a child’s hand when he stick it on the stove? Have you ever popped a child’s bottom to get his attention?”
No. I’ve scooped up a child to prevent them from getting hurt by a hot stove and I’ve childproofed my house to prevent common accidents. I’m opposed to hitting young kids to teach them to stay away from dangerous things. They don’t have the maturity to understand that kind of interaction. I prefer eliminating the danger or guarding against it and letting them live violent free.
I have never needed to bop my kids to get their attention. Speaking usually worked and if not a slight amplification with obvious annoyance always worked for me. This approach worked on multiple kids.
I was a stay at home parent for a while so I have experience too.
Your mileage apparently differed.
Maybe I had a different type of kid. You can child proof all you want. There’s no guarantee that your kid won’t find out some way to break the proofing.
The first time I smacked one of mine was for running off when a rapist was on the loose in the neighborhood. No way to child proof against that situation.
If I had ever caught one of my kids out on the street with a brick in hand, ready to throw it at the cops, I’d swat him too. Might have been just the ticket to keep the kid out of the juvie slammer.
or perhaps becoming dead.
Life has no guarantees but my children survived and I would say thrived. They did not end up in juvie or run away or injure themselves with careless behavior or get molested. It is one data point but it counters the general belief here that kids raised my way will turn out to be thugs and hooligans and police should have free reign to beat and abuse them because I, as parent, didn’t.
The main point (to redirect the conversation from me) is that the mother did a one person riot on the kid and everyone applauds while condemning rioting by the kids. The irony of that juxtaposition seems to have escape everyone.
Ed, I believe that the flaw in your logic is that you read things into the debate that haven’t been said. I believe your restatement is simply insulting to the people here. No one ever said that children who are never smacked will turn out to be hooligans. We are all speaking of moderation. We aren’t talking about harming children.
Now, having said that, I don’t consider what that woman did a one person riot. Let me ask you this: Why do you think that mother did what she did? Let me answer. I think you might just be too white and too middle class to know. She feared for her child’s life. That woman slapped her kid around out of love and was motivated by fear.
She cared enough about him to go out there and drag him home any way she knew how. I applaud her. She gave a damn. Too many parents don’t. They would rather blame someone else or say “My child would never…..” Was it the best way? For whom? For this lady, it might have been the only way. Judge not, lest ye be judged.
@Moon-howler
Amen.
And the kid himself, in a very recent TV interview, said that he had been embarrassed but that the whole thing showed that his mother really loves and cares about him. The kid has got that right.
This perhaps explains the infatuation with promoting Tonya as a hero…
“..mainstream media and white America are living vicariously through Graham “because she’s doing something that they wish that they could do to us and to our children.”
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/04/29/toya-graham-hero-mom_n_7175754.html
Ed, are you going to let Thomas talk down to you like a dumb white person then kiss his ass for it?
Of course she was motivated by fear for her child. She was a single mom protecting her one son. The other 5 kids are girls. Who is more at risk in America? Minority girls or minority boys? The answer is, at risk for what.
Have you ever personally witnessed a black mom straighten out her kid? She doesn’t have to slap. She can just give a mama look if need be. A tongue lashing can be good also. If there is no father figure around that mom has to be both parents. My hats are off to all single parents to have to play the role of both.
BTW, in the classroom, getting a young man aside and asking him if you need to call his mother is often a guarantee that he is going to straighten up and fly right.
Well, case closed then. The mind reader has spoken.
Actually, this time I think Ed’s on to something.
Moon is spot on with this one… I have nothing else to add other than I support every one of her comments 100%.
Oh boy, I’m lightheaded and have to lay down now. 🙂
Great job on this one Moon, I give you a lot of $hit but I couldn’t agree with you more on this.
You probably need a stiff drink after agreeing with me that much. 🙄
I think I get this now. Ed’s opinion piece accuses the mother of acting too white (doing what we all wish we could do anyway). A WaPo columnist yesterday accused her of acting too black (the stereotype of loud, violent black mother-ness). She can’t win. Why? Because she’s a mother. A woman. And women really can’t win, can they? Everyone knows what they’re supposed to be doing (have a career, stay home with your children, spank, don’t spank, breastfeed, vote this way, vote that way, stop having so many kids, adopt, but make sure you adopt American kids only), but nobody agrees on the script they’re supposed to follow. Even many women find it impossible to support other women’s choices. The only women who aren’t criticized are the ones who stayed invisible while their children looted, burned, and threw bricks.
The take-home to women: Stay invisible. Then nobody criticizes you.
Standing ovation for Emma! You rule.
I didn’t read the opinion piece. I just think that part of why people enjoy the story as much as we do is because they would like to wail on an aimless and destructive kid like that.
As soon as anyone’s writing an opinion piece saying anyone is too white, too black, etc. etc. then I tune out. Anyone who would write such things in an idiot, and out of mainstream thought.
@Moon-howler I’m thinking of opening a burqa boutique in Old Town. I’m willing to bet a few local politicians would front me the money.
I can name a couple of suggestions. Burqus R Us.
A free set of Frederick’s of Hollywood lingerie with each burqua would make for a great opening day draw.
Snicker. Wolve, we have a crew of pitch forks and torches folks in Manassas who really do get riled over such things. At one point, they wanted to set up cameras filming who went in and out of a certain store that sold ladies’ finery. [wink wink] I would have probably punched someone in the face for that affrontery.
Then there was the local politician who felt it appropriate to call my house and berate my support of the business.